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funny whatsapp status

Funny Status for Whatsapp

I’M Great In Bed. I Can Sleep For Days.

Nobody Texts Faster Than A Pissed Off Female.

Dear Karma, I Have A List Of People You Missed.

 I Can’T Taste My Lips. Could You Do It For Me ?

 Life Is Short. Smile While You Still Have Teeth.

 Kiss Me If I’M Wrong But Dinosaurs Still Exist Right ?

I Won’T Be Impressed With Technology Until I Can Download Food.

 It’S Better To Be Absolutely Ridiculous Than Absolutely Boring

 The Four Words A Girl Most Wants To Hear. I Bought You Food.

My Mom Said ” Follow Your Dreams “, So I Went Back To Bed.

Oh! I Am Sorry. I Forgot. I Only Exist When You Need Something.

 If I Had A Dollar For Every Smart Thing You’ve Said I’D Be Poor. 

 I’M Going To Stand Outside. So If Anyone Asks, I Am Outstanding.

I Am Currently Experiencing Life At The Rate Of 15 Wtf's Every Hours.

Marriage Lets You Annoy One Special Person For The Rest Of Your Life.

When I Was A Kid I Used To Think The Moon Followed Our Car Everywhere.

My Room Is Not Messy, It Is An Obstacle Course Designed To Keep Me Fit.

 God Made Every Person Different. He Got Tired By The Time He Got To China.

I Don’T Always Get Asked Out On A Date. But When I Do….It’S On April 1st.

I Wasn’T Mad. But Now That You Asked Me 7 Times If I’M Mad…Yes, I’M Mad !

I Don’T Need A Hair Stylist, My Pillow Gives Me A New Hairstyle Every Morning.

 During The Day, I Don’T Believe In Ghosts. Ar Night I’M Little More Open-Minded.

I’M Super Lazy Today !! Which Is Like Normal Lazy, But I’M Also Wearing A Cape.

Don’T Think Of Yourself As An Ugly Person. Think If Yourself As A Beautiful Monkey.

 Dear Math, Please Grow Up & Solve Your Own Problems. I’M Tried Of Solving Them For You.

 Long Time Ago I Used To Have A Life, Until Someone Told Me To Get Into Social Networking.

Always Speak The Truth No Matter How Bitter Harsh It It. But Run Immediately After Saying It.

Chocolates Comes From Cocoa, Which Is Tree. That Makes It A Plant….So Chocolate Is A Salad.

My Idea Of A Good Morning Is One When I Open My Eyes, Take A Deep Breath, Then Go Back To Sleep.

They Say That Love Is More Important Than Money, But Have Ever Tried To Pay Your Bills With A Hug ?

 No. I Am Not Single. I Am In A Long Distance Relationship Because My Future Boyfriend Lives In Future.

When Guys Get Jealous, Its Actually Kind A Cute. When Girls Get Jealous World War Iii Is A About To Start.

 When I Text You A Massive Paragraph And You Reply 40 Minutes Late With ” K “….Are You Asking To Be Punched ?

When You’Are Stressed, You Eat Ice Cream, Cake, Chocolate & Sweets. Why ? Because Stressed Spelled Backwards Is Desserts.

 I Wish Falling In Love Has Traffic Light Too, So That I Would Know If I Should Go For It, Slow Down, Or Just Stop.

I Changes My Password To “Incorrect” So Whenever I Forget What It Is, The Computer Will Say ” Your Password Is Incorrect “.

People Often Say Laughter Is The Best Medicine, But They Neglect To Mention That An Overdose Can Cause One’S Ass Too Fall Off.

I wish I could mute people in real life.

Women may not hit harder. But they hit lower.

I don’t go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me.

Hey, there Whatsapp is using me.

80% of boys have girlfriends… Rest 20% boys are having the brain.

Take my advice, I don’t use it anyway.

If stress burned calories, I’d be a supermodel.

Totally available!! Please disturb me!!!!

Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

The only thing I gained so far in 2018 is weight!

Relationship status: looking for a wifi connection.

You can never buy love, but still, you have to pay for it.

Be warned: I’m bored. This could get dangerous.

I’m so poor I can’t even pay attention!

Whatsapp users never die, they just go offline.

I’m too lazy to stop being lazy.

I will marry a girl who looks pretty in aadhaar card.

As usual, there is a great woman behind every idiot.

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

If Monday had a face, I would punch it

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

Kiss me if I’m wrong but dinosaurs still exist right?

Marriage is a workshop where the husband works & wife shops.

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